Black Girl

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Oh dear sweet little black girl…

This small world just ain’t ready-

for all this big ol magic

 

Too fat

Too thin

Too yellow

Too black

Too…much

Too soon

Tic toc,tic toc

When will the time be anywhere like right?

Fix your clocks..and your face

When nite becomes day and day becomes nite

When girl’s fleabites become mountains

When hips round,curve and blossom

 

When you aint so little anymore

When hands accidentally brush across your azz

when it was not very much of an accident but they hoped you’d give them a pass

When notes are passed around about you in class

heads hang in shame

but not the right ones

being sucked into cruel childish games

You mourned the death of your innocence before it was officially murdered

You wrote pages and pages about it in your pink diary

the one with the ragged lock

And your mama read it and called you a whore

But wait

There is more

As you felt your value slip thru your fingers

Yet the self loathing still lingers

then..now…later…

Little black girl

they told you

you aint shyt

and they meant it

get used to it

in many others eyes you are less than it

you must not give up

nor give in

When you do they win…

Weave  your own tales

Cast your own spells

Acknowledge your frailties

and demons too

gather them and place into a magic bottle

rub its belly

Make that wish

You know the one

one of many..but still…

this one has a happy ending

maybe a happy middle and a halfway decent start

The world is cruel but you don’t have to be

you must not ever allow it to swallow your heart

pain will come

pain will go

You shall be more than resilient

you will stumble crack and fall

you will regain your footing

it is written in your genes

You have little choice in the matter

Your forever beats inside of your ample chest

 

bumped and bruised

stomped upon and abused

Far more times than you can count

it will be discarded and disregarded

But know this is little else-sweet little black girl…

You shall do more than merely survive

You will continue to love

you will be loved

you will thrive

Your ancestors will not stand for anything less

and eventually neither will you

This world will learn to catch up

In time..

Epiphany Castro 2017 All Rights Reserved

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Traveling without moving..

I just returned from vacation and one thing occurred to me.  I DO NOT DIG TRAVELING!  Ok so let me rephrase that-I prefer short spurts of vacations.. More than 3 days and I am hella tapped out.  I start missing my dogs,my bed and my pillows.

 

I know what you are thinking..I see you judging me..that’s cool tho..I still ain’t gonna change my mind tho…  I have done a gang of traveling in my 103 years on earth..I have finally come to the conclusion that I prefer a STAYCATION…yes sir!  I can do the short snorts…the long ones?  Nah..I’m good.  I know the romance of it all is quite enchanting.  I get that..but when it comes down to it I just cannot..  Traveling gets on my last black nerve.

 

Does this burst your bubble about me?  Maybe.  Does it matter? Nope. Did it ever matter? I doubt it.  What it does for me is a sense of freedom.  Telling the truth is always quite freeing.    My idea of a proper rest does not include the bullshyt at the airports from TSA or road trips holding my pee pee till the next stop.  Nope.  I would rather do a little staycation where I can return home in a maximum of 4 days.  Unless it was Paris.  Paris requires much more of a commitment.  I dig Paris…

In the meantime I will be sticking closer to home…The dope thing about living in the Bay Area is we have options!!!!  You want the beach?  Cool let’s go…You wanna ski-right on..Tahoe here we come…You want mountains and trees???  Redwoods..no problem.  We are the center of the universe in my opinion..  That is why San Francisco is often referred to as “The Paris of the USA”..That said..I will stay right here…in the most beautiful city in the world..San Francisco..

 

 

 

Where oh where have all the black owned beauty supply stores gone????

I am born and raised in Berkeley,California.  This means I grew up literally in a serious melting pot of culture. Going to the Beauty Shop on Saturday’s was pretty normal for most of us..others maybe on special occasions.  Me?  My Mommy and grandmamma had me up on the kitchen sink leaning back..unless it was Easter or sumthing special where the sent me to the shop.

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This said I come from a pretty long line of women who took their hands into their own hair.  This also means we frequented numerous beauty supply shops in and around Berkeley.  There was always one open..always someone with a gang of advice to help and  always at a reasonable price..  I do not ever recall being treated poorly in any of these establishments.  I do not recall being followed around as if I am going to steal shyt.  I do not recall dreading going into these stores one bit.  In fact-much like my addiction to drugstores I used to REALLY dig going in and sniffing around.  When I was small I went with my mom…when I was in college I went with girlfriends and various hairdresser buddies.  Then one day…poof!  They all seemed to disappear.  Gone..  Bye.

 

The weird thing is most of the shops I frequented were family owned.  Generations of black folks doing their thang..  What happened to interest Asian business to swoop in and really just make straight $$$ off of african americans?  I am no expert,I do not  have the   answers..I just think it quite curious.  Remember in the film “Good Hair” when Chris Rock was trying to speak about nappy hair to the asian owner of a beauty supply??  He was basically told nappy hair doesn’t “sell”.

 

Hmmm…I know here in the bay area being natural is not a big deal..  In fact I see more natural black women than not for the most part.  I realize this is not always the case across the nation but we naturals have been making great strides.  When I fist returned to my natural state in 1993 there was no YouTube,instagram and such..No products available really for natural hair.  I cannot recall the last time I went into a beauty Supply and was helped by a black person..

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Things have changed.  Now if you aint careful you can easily get sucked into the abyss of being a serious product  junkie. There are soooooooooooooo many products out there…Wouldnt it be nice just once in a while to walk into a store and be greeted by someone who looks like you who could help you with your needs and you KNOW they “get it”???

 

I am not sure if we will ever get back to that comforting time where you knew the person selling you products at the beauty supply but what I don’t understand is why there are literally NO BLACK OWNED BEAUTY SUPPLY STORES!!!!!  Come on…  I dont get it… Where did they go and why?  I miss them…Yes I buy ALOT of products from black owned companies online but what about Brick and mortar shops?  Will that warm and fuzzy welcoming feeling ever happen again??? Le Sigh…I wish I could say I am hopeful but well..I ain’t.

 

10 natural hair commandments…via DeeCoily (Nappturality founder)

I have been natural since 1993…never a hard road,just a long one. There is sooooo much info out there I decided to try to create a few mini information posts to help a sista out.  I give to u all…Dee Coiley’s 10 hair commandments….

 

1-WATER!!!!!  Yes H2O is your friend…use her.. love her…hug her with open arms…  Dee suggests using filtered water as to not invite all those pesky little extras your hair simply does not need nor like.

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2-No sulfates…no no no…not in your shampoo..not in your conditioner..no bueno…

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3-Sleep in a satin bonnet/scarf…whatever it takes yo…do yo thang but do it in a satin sumthin sumthin

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4-Protective styles are your friends!!!!  Yes lawd….the elements aint always your homey.  braid it up,wrap it up…rock a dope wig..blah blah blah…at least twice weekly… Your hair will let out a sigh of relief

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5-be eazy with dat colour and only apply to new growth..Come on now u already know this yes?????

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6-Beware of hand in hair disease..  this shyt can be an epidemic..  stop fussing…it aint a good look..leave your hair be..overmanipulation causes breakage

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7-Mind your nutrition! We are what we eat…if you are lacking in essentials your hair will be too..  Handle that shyt..

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8-Heat..beware…do I really need to say this shyt????  Heat ain’t cute.  If u must use do with extreme caution..  Burnt hair ain;t a good look

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9-Butter baby…shea…mango..coconut…its all good…butter it up

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10-Say hell naw to petroleum…ummmmm….would u put gasoline on your body?  Hair?  Mouth?  Stop it…

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Now…I give u the knowledge…what u choose to do with it…well?  That’s your biz…

See ya on the flip side…E

Radio Nappturality is comin ya’ll…

I have been natural nearly 25 years…Long ago it was difficult to link with like-minded individuals…then I found exactly what I was seeking..  A place to park my feet and call home.  I found Nappturality.com!!!!!  I fell in love with the site.  mind you-this was before YouTube..Instagram..Pintintrest..ya’ll newbies are spoiled as hell!!!!  Google had not launched yet…there were forums and chat rooms were not really around yet.  We made that shyt work tho…I found kindred family.  I found answers.  I found love.  I found friends..  Who knew I would become dear friends with our beloved fearless leader,Patricia Gaines AKA Dee Coiley..

 

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For years this spot has been my staple stomping grounds and I have often toyed with the idea of doing a radio show based on the idea of all napps all the time.  I ran it by Dee during my sabbatical from radio and she LOVED the idea so VOILA!!!!!!!  Radio Nappturality was born..

I am so proud to be entrusted with her baby..her brand.  Next Sunday June 4th I launch the podcast.  I will air the 1st Sunday of each month as I did for 10 years with Epiphany’s House.  For now the broadcast is one hour.  I will extend it as time goes by if I feel the need.  Dee will join us all the way from the land down under next week but not every month.  That’s MY job..  I wanna hear from y’all.  I want to know what you want..what you do not want and why it is important for our community to have this forum…

 

See ya at the show…Love,Epiphany